It happened to her first… and then it happened to me...

It happened to her first… and then it happened to me...

One year later.

Exactly a year ago, I ended my blog with a line:
“I will only talk about this today and save the discussion of panic attacks for another time." And today, I remembered that line a line that had quietly waited to be acknowledged.
So here I am. Talking about it.

A few year back, I was having a conversation with one of my close friends. She started telling me about something weird she had been experiencing sudden fast heartbeats, breathlessness, an overwhelming sense that something terrible was about to happen.

She was scared and confused.
The worst part? She had once tried telling someone about this before, and they brushed it off saying she was overreacting or being too dramatic. Since then, she stopped telling people.
But that day, she opened up to me.
And I didn’t laugh. I didn’t ignore her.
I simply said,
“Let’s Google it.”

We started searching
And instead of getting answers, Google gave us a hundred new fears.
We saw words like heart attack, cancer, serious illness and it only made her feel worse.
Her symptoms were not straightforward. Sometimes it felt like an allergy, sometimes like a panic.
We were completely lost.
We didn’t even know which doctor she should go to a heart specialist, a skin specialist, a neurologist?
Slowly, her episodes became less frequent.
Time passed.
And somehow, we both forgot about that whole phase.
She started feeling normal again.

Until… it happened to me.
It was 18th October (I won’t mention the year) I clearly remember the date because what I felt that day was something I can never forget.
Suddenly, it felt like I was dying.
My heart was pounding and then it felt like it had slowed down too much.
My body was shaking, and I felt like I couldn’t breathe.
I quietly sat down in a corner, tears rolling down my face.
It felt like someone had taken everything away from me.
Like I was empty, lost, broken all at once.
That episode lasted for about 15–20 minutes.
When I could finally think clearly again,
the first thing I did was call that same friend.
The one who had once shared her story with me.
I told her what had happened, and she simply said:
“Yes… the same thing used to happen to me too.”
And that’s when I called another friend of mine and shared everything.
She was the one who finally gave this experience a name.
She said:
“You had an anxiety attack.”

That night, I searched everything about it.
Anxiety. Panic attacks. Mental health.
And I realised how badly we need to talk about this.
I also realised something that really hurts
Whenever we talk about therapy, or healing, or anything related to mental health… people treat it like a joke.
Either they make fun of it or say things like:
“Oh, you want to go to a pagloon ka Doctor?”

Why do we still think like this?
Why is mental health such a taboo in our society?
Why do we only believe something is real if it’s visible in a blood report?
Today’s generation is going through so much.
and panic attacks and anxiety are not rare anymore.
They are common.
And we need to normalise them.
When we have a stomach ache, we see a doctor.
When we break a bone, we get an X-ray.
Then what’s wrong in seeing a therapist when your mind is hurting?
Mental health is health. That’s it.

Nothing to be ashamed of.
And if you’ve ever gone through something like this
Please know:
You’re not alone.
You’re not “too sensitive.”
And no, it’s not all in your head.
You are valid.
You matter.



What Does a Panic Attack Feel Like?

It feels like drowning silently.
Your body may be still on the outside, but your mind is screaming. Loud. Restless. Unstoppable.
It drowns out everything else.

You’re scared but of what, you don’t know.
There’s no visible threat, yet your heart races.
You want to run, but there’s nowhere to go.
You want to scream, but your voice won’t come out.
You wish someone would hold you but you can’t even ask.

It’s chaos... hidden behind a calm face.



What Helps During a Panic Attack?

These are the things that have helped people I know and eventually, me too:

Accept the moment.
Don’t fight it. Don’t push it away. Just say, “Okay, this is happening. And it will pass.”

Breathe. Slowly.
A simple method:
Inhale for 4 counts.
Hold for 4.
Exhale for 4.
Do this a few times. Let your breath remind you... you’re alive. You’re still here.

Stay grounded.
Touch the floor.
Hold onto a cushion, a fabric, a wall.
Feel it.
Remind yourself:
“I am here. I am safe.”

Have faith.
Even broken duas matter.
Even the silent prayers whispered in your heart they count. They reach.


What Causes a Panic Attack?

Honestly? Sometimes, we don’t even know.
But often, it’s:
The weight of expectations
The habit of overthinking
The tendency to hold everything in
The fear of failing
The guilt of not being “enough”
The overwhelming uncertainty of what lies ahead
It builds up silently… and then bursts, all at once.

So if you’ve ever felt this the tightness in your chest, the racing thoughts, the invisible fear please know this:
You are not weak.
You are not broken.
You are human.

Healing isn’t linear, and it's okay to have days when you're not okay.
But you are brave for feeling this deeply.
You are strong for making it through the storm, even when no one saw it.

Keep going.
You don’t have to carry this alone.
Help exists. Hope exists. And so do better days.

You are not alone and you never have to be again.

Sher-
जो लफ़्ज़ ना कह सके वो आँसू कह गए,
ख़ामोश रहकर भी हम बहुत कुछ सह गए।