“In Those 3000 Footsteps, I Found Myself”

27-april-2017

4:00 PM

Today’s morning was very memorable for me. I think I will never forget this memory. Until today, I had never gone anywhere alone. But today, around 8:30 in the morning, I got the chance to return home alone from my college.

This journey was just 2.1 km for others. But today, this small 2.1 km journey became very memorable for me.

The distance from my college to my home is 2.1 km. It is not very far, and the path is absolutely straight. It is approximately 3000 footsteps.

Today I decided, I will go home alone.

As I started walking slowly, something felt different. The usually crowded path was completely peaceful for unknown reasons. The whole road was surrounded by buildings and a huge banyan tree attached along the roadside buildings. I have passed through this route many times before, but today everything looked new. A very lovely, sweet, cold breeze was moving around me.

I was feeling very good something I had never felt before. I didn’t fully understand what was happening inside me.

After walking a short distance, a woman was coming from the opposite side. I looked at her and smiled, and she smiled back at me.

I kept walking without hesitation, without fear.

At one point, I turned back and looked at the entire road behind me. I realized I was the only person on that road.

There was no one beside me.

There was no one to guide me.

There was no one to ask me why I got married so early.

There was no one to ask me why I am studying after marriage.

There was no one to ask me where my children would be.

There was no one to ask me why I came to my mother’s house for so many days.

I was completely free from all the bonds and rules of society. Nobody could impose any restrictions on me.

I have a different world. My feelings are different from others, and everyone’s feelings are different in their own way.

If a stranger looks at me strangely, it does not mean that I am bad or that I am wearing something wrong. Maybe he has his own reason to look that way.

But no problem.

Who cares?

I had crossed halfway. The beautiful and ancient building Rajwada Palace was in front of me.

Around that place, there were tea and poha shops, along with the smell of samosas and kachoris in the air. I usually go there in the evening when it is very crowded. I have visited Rajwada many times, but today it felt different.

I was getting soaked in sweat, yet I felt alive.

I was just about to reach home. I knew I would walk this way again someday. Deep inside, I was praying that this path should not end.

But my journey of thoughts ended when I reached home safely.

This path was filled with experiences for me.

Apart from being someone’s daughter, someone’s sister, someone’s daughter-in-law, someone’s wife, someone’s friend

I found a different identity for myself.

“A FREE WOMAN.”

I am the owner of my desires.

I am a reader.

I am a writer.

I am a poet.

I am a dreamer.

I am a creator.

I make my own world. I fulfill my wishes and sometimes others’ wishes too.

Every day, I may be the reason for someone’s happiness or the cause of someone’s disappointment.

But my decisions are mine.

My wishes are mine.

There is no need for anyone to speak good or bad about me. If I do not harm anyone behind their back, then no one should harm me either.

My truth is mine.

My lies are mine.

My thinking is mine.

My opinions are mine.

My challenges are mine.

My changes are mine.

I have not given anyone the right to judge me in any way.

Because, I am a "FREE WOMAN."